The Snail Factory


The Snail Factory

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I shall tell you the tale of Limax Maximus.

Built at the factory, the famous slug came off the assembly line flawless. If he had been puny or sickly or misshapen, he would have been discarded. But a model of tough sluggery, he was released in the land of Lacedaemon where he swung triumphant from the treetops on a sturdy strand of his own mucus. He feasted, he mated, he fought.

But then one day, betrayed by the slugs around him who feared his prowess, he was tricked and returned to the factory as defective. His arrival coincided with the start of Dr. Breign's insidious games. Made a Gastroladiator, his skills learned in the real world served him well and he became a crowd favorite. The Great Grey Slug, they called him. After his victories over Ariolimax the Bashing Banana and Cinereoniger the Keelbacked, Maximus was presented in a state of triumph and high honors to Dr. Breign who would grant him his freedom.

Unfortunately Breign didn't see him and ran over the poor thing, smashing him in the biggest explosion of mucus and slug guts the Colosseum ever saw. A statue was erected in his memory, but Dr. Breign ran over it as well.