The Snail Factory

Pertwee the Paraclete

The Snail Factory

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Nobody at the factory had any idea what Pertwee's job was, not even Pertwee. Certainly not Chunks and Schooner who discuss him above. He was in fact supposed to have been thrown out when the intended Breign backup clone project was abandoned. But he seems to have crept out of Dr. Rhizo's waste bin and grown into that most fearsome and grotesque of monsters, the corporate cheerleader.

As such he managed to receive more raises and bonuses than anyone else at the Factory, but as all raises and bonuses were calculated as percentages of his usual paycheck (of which there was none), he never made a cent. Which he didn't mind, of course, and which the company appreciated as they thought they were saving money by not paying one of the staff. In the end, it was the Factory that came out behind as they supplied his food (he never slept or requested a room).

Pertwee is alive today and currently works as a yes-man for Ralph Nader.