Sell Out Vault 9

A Blog about Villainy, Entertainment and Shameless Self Promotion.

R.I.P. First Computer-

Tonight we give a eulogy for a machine. Here is Old Dell's info:

Processor: Pentium 4 - 1.6 GHz
RAM: 256MB
Video Card: GeForce 2 Ti
Hard Drive: 40 GB
With dial-up modem, 3.5-inch floppy dish drive. Purchased in mid 2002; used as a server from early 2008 until early 2012.

- False Prophet

How to Be a Villain Book-

In this first episode of False Prophet's book club, we look at the sheer motivational awesomeness that is Neil Zawacki's 'How to Be a Villain: Evil Laughs, Secret Lairs, Master Plans, and More!!!' as well as its companion book 'The Villain's Guide to Better Living'.

So you've decided to be evil (Wayback Machine)

How to Be a Villain: Evil Laughs, Secret Lairs, Master Plans, and More!!!

The Villain's Guide to Better Living

- False Prophet

Will the Venom movie suck?-

We discuss the upcoming Venom movie that Sony has set to release in 2018, explore possibilities of what it might be about, and whether it will turn out well or not.

History Of Venom

Truth in Journalism (short film about venom)

- False Prophet


The Millennial King-

Ari Bach, friend of the site and creator of The Snail Factory, has released a new book called The Millennial King. Written to be a myth for modern times, it's an extremely funny and inspirational medieval fantasy tale. But it's also more than that, it's both scathing social satire and commentary, that explores many of the widespread pessimistic attitudes towards the younger generations in our society. It's designed to be a hero story for a generation that has never had these types of heroes to represent them. It addresses issues such as finding one's purpose and place in the world, and coming into one's own. It's very imaginative, poignant and ultimately satisfying. A quest to discover what is worth questing after.

If you enjoy the kind of humor that is featured on Ari's popular Tumblr blog Facts I Just Made Up, you should definitely check out The Millennial King. Ari Bach is also the author of the Valhalla trilogy, an epic action/science fiction series.

- False Prophet


10th Anniversary-

10 years ago today was the official launch of Quite amazing actually. A lot has changed with the Internet and even the site since then. We've grown, we've created and accumulated new content and we've improved our villainous skills.

And since that first day back in October 2006, we have gained a better perspective of who we are and what we do. We've refined our approach quite a bit. And of course we fully intend to continue to spread our dark tentacles out into the Internet and hopefully culture in general. And we intend to have fun.

This year saw a very meaningful achievement for us. We released our first game on Steam. Now that Twisty's Asylum Escapades has been unleashed on to a larger audience, we hope that it will make an impact, and you can be sure that Reptile Zoo is coming up next.

In one of the very first posts on Twisted Jenius, an Evil Rants called "Why Villainy?", I ended it by saying "But whether you find my opinions good or bad is irrelevant, as long as they're interesting." I have a feeling that things are about to get very interesting indeed! So as a surreal, dimly lit dawn rises on another decade of Twisted Jenius, we hope that you will tune in as we continue our sinister journey.

In his book "How to be a Villain", Neil Zawacki says regarding the dictionary the definition of evil- "But isn't there more to it than that? Yes, what the dictionary cleverly leaves is for an elect few to know: Evil is fun". So for this coming decade, let's have some fun. After all, what else is entertainment about?

- False Prophet


Twisty is being unleashed on Steam!-

The time has come for Twisty's Asylum Escapades to break out and be unleashed on the Steam store. For anyone who's been paying attention to what we've been up to at Twisted Jenius, we've spent the last year remastering the game, improving and completely overhauling all of the graphics, and adding new areas and new content to get it ready for a wider audience. And today it's finally going to be available on Steam.

The inclusion of our first game on the Steam platform is a very big and important step for us as game developers. It's the first time many people are going to see our villainous work. And indeed a lot of work went into this fiendish project over the years, and we can't wait to see the results! So go check it out and have some fun playing as everyone's favorite a giant floating brain with teeth!

- False Prophet


Dark Musings are Back!-

As we begin the final leg of remastering our oddly compelling video game Twisty's Asylum Escapades for its upcoming Steam release, we are going to be bringing you another batch of Twisted Jenius's Dark Musings; our sinister and cynical series of darkly comedic ideas and observations about the world, life and, most prominently, how the world is going to eventually end your life. But don't let that scare you off, you don't have to be suicidal or death-obsessed to enjoy these. There's also plenty of corrupting encouragement and evil enthusiasm for the budding sociopath out there as well! Because we care.

Of course we realize that this type of dark humor will only be enjoyed by a certain kind of exceptional person. In some ways Twisted Jenius's Dark Musings are a little like laughter, happiness and a feeling of self-worth; they're clearly not meant for everyone.

And if you haven't seen them already, be sure to check out all of our previous Dark Musings!

- False Prophet

Ari Bach Announces Jealous Gods-

Ari Bach, the artist and writer responsible for The Snail Factory webcomic which is featured on Twisted Jenius, as well as the author of the Valhalla trilogy of books, has announced that he is going to be making a film called Jealous Gods.

Jealous Gods is described as "a college comedy with a twist" and centers on three students who get their wishes granted, with chaotic results. With its origins as a superhero spoof, the film promises biting satire and an examination of the realistic tendencies of people to act corrupt when given extraordinary power.

Jealous Gods begins shooting in early 2016 and casting is currently in progress in Colorado. Ari Bach is writer and director of the film. You can find out more at his tumblr blog about the project.

- False Prophet


Twisted Jenius is 9 years old today!-

It was 9 years ago today that begin spreading it's dark vision of weird and villainous entertainment to the world (that's got to be half a century in Internet time). In that time we've done a lot of stuff and accumulated quite a lot of content on the site and this coming year you can expect to see even more from us.

For starters, we will be releasing the remastered edition of our first game Twisty's Asylum Escapades on the Steam platform. And you can expect to see a lot more from our second video game project Reptile Zoo: The Sinister Mutation, which we have already begun developing and will continue working on after the release of Asylum Escapades (be sure to follow along with our game developer blog of madness for news on that). We also have more Dark Musings coming in the next few months, ands there's a chance that you may even get to see more of our fiendishly insightful Evil Rants (articles).

I'd be remiss not to mention that friend of the site and creator of the webcomic The Snail Factory, Ari Bach, also has some stuff coming up. The third installment of his Valhalla sci-fi trilogy of books will be released later this month and he may have another equally compelling project that he's working on and will undoubtedly update you about on his tumblr blog when it's time.

There's a lot going on and I have some very high hopes for this year. If you'd like to stay updated on all of our latest schemes and plots, you can follow us on our twitter, tumblr or just go to the source, the enduring and irrepressibly evil!

- False Prophet


There's More Twisty to Come-

For the last couple of months we've been working on remastering our first indie game, Twisty's Asylum Escapades. This is a fairly sizable update, as we are remaking and improving large portions of the game, including almost all of the graphics. The reason that we're doing this is because the game was greenlit on Steam, and we'd like to make a good impression when releasing our first game on that extremely popular platform.

Truth be told, we had actually considered Twisty's Asylum Escapades a completed project, and had moved on to developing our second game, Reptile Zoo: The Sinister Mutation, when TAE was approved to be put up on Steam. Happily, it was only a short time later that Reptile Zoo was also greenlit, and so we will be continuing development on that title right after we release the remastered version of TAE.

I have to say, despite pushing back our overall development schedule, I am very pleased that Twisty's Asylum Escapades is getting this second chance to be seen and played by what is probably a much larger audience than it was previously exposed to. This crazy little game with a man-eating brain deserves a bit more attention than it got and as the first game that we ever developed (and one that prominently features our company mascot no less), we here at Twisted Jenius are quite proud of our bizarre creation and hope that you will check it out when this improved version is released. Until then, I will try to keep everyone updated about our development.

- False Prophet

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